Bed Stories

Well, I remember my first Philippino “bed” in 1982, while being in Mindanao. They called it “banig”: you just lay on a bamboo mat right on the floor. Every inch of my body ached when I awoke next morning. It has been one of the most unforgettable memories of experiences and the heartily hospitality of Philippinos, living in a very poor cottage, but sharing with me some handfuls of rice and a family coke… .It happened on my way back to Davao coming from Monkayo…

Well, I also remember how many times I started to whine, when I had to go to bed as a little boy. Still being as happy as a a sand boy I only had one thing in mind. Stay up, stay up!!! My eyes became already quadrangular because of terrible tiredness, but I didn’t care. Adult’s life at night must be really mysterious - and, we kids shouldn’t be with them any more. Tears, screaming, up tp six times getting up, running to the living room, where they were still gathering together and enjoy drinking wine… .

Every night - yes, but the worst was the so-called ’siesta’, another interruption of games and funs. During these times, at the second half of my life I am really happy and enjoy ’siestas’, especially during weekends.

While being still young, we actually don’t need a bed. The bed is only useful to cry out our lovesickness and later, to share (again with a loved one).

And then? Time came, where we shared our bed with someone - whole days and nights under one blanket - ay, better don’t get up any more?

Everything “important” happened in bed: love nights, endless telephone calls, full of life and weary of life books, intimate breakfasts… The beds really changed: the child bed could become a simple floor mattress while getting a massage because of back pain. I also remember an extendible couch and all those crazy ceremonious constructions such as a waterbed!!

And then? Here we are in our special health bed with body friendly mattress and adjustable bed construction. Hey, if I only could lay down earlier…??? And then? We are staying in our luxurious unit, called bed, and we can’t fall asleep because all the thoughts of the day harass, bother and haunt us. We roll from one side to another, count stupid sheep (…898,899,900, sleep nalang!) - or go on sleeping. We listen the dogs in the neighbourhood barking and the cats flirting… .

Sometimes I envy Leonardo da Vinci (Italian painter, scholar and technician, 1452-1519(, who only needed 15 minutes sleep (but every four hours). On the other hand Albert Einstein (German physicist, 1879-1955) needed to sleep 12 full hours daily to think and probably change the world.

Yes, if we become sick and had to stay in bed, we might start hating it - no wonder! And our deathbed might become one of the wonderful white clouds in the sky - as my late Grandmother always said… .

Our attitude regarding our bed change from time to time, but a bed remains, what it is: a bed - a bed in every apartment, in every house, in every hotel room or even in the guest room or maids quarter in our houses here in the Philippines. Everything - the whole world might change, but there is always a bed, which lures and tempts, waits and threatens. Our bed, a flight and escape castle, a safe and secure place.

Even, it’s just a ‘banig’ in a very little cottage here in the Philippines. Or a ‘kama’, ‘higaan’ or ‘higdaan’…

Did you see the Olympics?

Now for the first time in decades my home country of the UK did a fantastic job at the Beijing Olympics. Well done team GB!!                I JUST WISH i COULD HAVE SEEN IT.

Now the news networks mainly showed still pictures as they did not have the rights to show and the TV networks here in the Philippines had very strange coverage to say the least.

Solar showed pay for view coverage so the only other channel showing the Olympics was the CRIME and ADVENTURE network, yes you heard correct. Now I knew we were in for a rough time from the opening ceremony as the coverage that was allegedly live was stopped every five or six minutes by about seven minutes of commercials, the same ones again and again and again to the point you would know it from memory.

The commercials would come on and off without any consideration to the action that was taking place, and as the coverage seemed to be from an Australian network it  was hard for me to follow anything as the Australian network was talking to its viewers and the Philippine audience would have to catch up after the commercials even to the point that the opening ceremony nearly lost the entrance of its own athletes entering the stadium.

But not to worry when we had no commercials we had short films about previous Olympics and the hopefuls from this country, this would be INSTEAD of the live coverage!! When we returned live the torture was not over, as we then got a screen full of non stop sponsors covering the action.

Now well done team UK and all the other teams andi n 2012 its the turn of LONDON and if I am in the UK I will watch it on the BBC without any commercials!!!

Washed up performers

Over the years, I have noticed time and time again that the Philippines seems to be a lingering stage for washed up performers.  Time and again, bands that were popular 25, 30, even 50 years ago tour in the Philippines, and often to sold out audiences!  I mean, we are talking about people who were popular in the States back in the 60’s, even in the 50’s.  We are talking about bands and singers from the USA, Australia and other places in the world.  These people were famous in their home countries, or even worldwide in their day, but sadly their day seems to have passed.  Many of these performers would have a hard time drawing much of a crowd back home in the USA, yet they play to sold-out audiences here in Davao, and in other Cities in the Philippines like Manila, Cebu and Cagayan de Oro.

Of course, most of these people play in Manila, but more and more they are venturing south.  With the latest troubles in Mindanao, I can’t be certain that they will continue this trend, but in the past couple of years this has been the case.

One thing that I have a hard time understanding is how people can afford tickets for these events.  Tickets for such events here in Davao often go for as much as P3,000 (about $70 or so), and this is at fairly large venues that can hold thousands of people!  Often, even the lowest priced tickets are a minimum of P500 or so, which would seem to be totally out of reach of even middle class families here.  I mean, P500 is about $12 or so, and the average salary here is only around P4,000 to P6,000 per month.  That is as much as 1/8 of a month’s salary!  Wow!

What do you think?  Does it surprise you that these seemingly washed up performers can still rake in a few bucks here in the Philippines?

photo credit: artolog

My friend that I never got to meet

I lost a friend a few weeks ago.  He passed away at a young age, just 48, way too young to die.  I say that I lost a friend, but the truth is that I never met the man.  I felt like he was a friend, though.  He was a man that I wanted to meet for a couple of years now.  I have been told that he also wanted to meet me.  There were two or three times when we had each been scheduled to be at certain places at the same time and would finally meet each other, but in each instance one of us, or the other, was unable to make it.  Honestly, I was shocked when I heard of his death.

The man that I am speaking of is a great man indeed.  His name is Datu Toto Paglas.  Toto was a Muslim man who hailed from Maguindanao Province, here on the island of Mindanao.  In terms of his family, and his people, Toto was literally royalty.  He was born of a father who was the head of one powerful Muslim family and a mother who was from a second powerful family in Muslim Mindanao.  He was the product of the two most powerful families in Muslim Mindanao, yet these two families were mortal enemies, until Toto came along.  It was through Toto that the Paglas clan and the Pendatun clan came together.

It all happened in the late 1950’s when the senior Datu Paglas (Toto’s father) met a young lady and fell in love.  Unfortunately, this love was taboo, because she was the daughter of the family’s mortal enemy, the Pendatun clan.  Although their love was forbidden by the elders in each of their families, they wed secretely and had a child.  When this child came, the families decided to put their differences aside and join forces.  With this joining of forces, Datu Toto Paglas, a mere child, became royalty - having come from the two most powerful Muslim families in Mindanao at that time, and finally having joined together.

Over the years, Toto’s story took many turns, and in the long run, he put his immense power to good use.  He brought peace to his village, which is aptly named after his father and him as well, Datu Paglas Town, Maguindanao.  I visited Datu Paglas myself last year, I wanted to witness the place that boasts of such a powerful story of peace.  In the 1990’s when Toto was the mayor of Datu Paglas, he started a banana plantation and put people to work - Christians and Muslims.  This banana plantation, and Toto’s many other accomplishments and projects brought work for poor people in Maguindanao, and it brought peace to an area that had previously been at war.  There was a day when you could be shot for any reason in Datu Paglas, even for no reason at all.  Those days are gone, though, thanks to Toto and his vision of peace.  You can read the full story about Toto’s childhood and adult accomplishments on my Mindanao Blog, if you like.

Toto died on August 8, 2008, and his death shocked me.  I didn’t even know he was sick.  He died at Davao Doctor’s Hospital.  He died of meningitis, and complications of Diabetes.  Toto knew that I wanted to meet him, and I was told that he also wanted to meet me and was aware of the things that I have done to promote Mindanao over the Internet.  I really wish that I would have had the opportunity to meet this great man.  In addition to his work bringing peace to Mindanao, Toto was also a member of the Eisenhauer Foundation, working on bringing peace to every part of the world.

I wish we could have met, Toto!

How much did it cost to move?

Long posting again, but I hope this information is helpful. I have noticed that many people ask regularly on this blog how much it costs to move here. Well, we arrived here in mid-April of this year, and, nearly five months in, we are just about done with expenses related to the move. So, I’ll detail how much it cost us to move from the Middle East. Our experience is based on Manila… Your expenses will obviously vary in other parts of the country.

In Abu Dhabi, Rebecca and I had very few belongings… Her furniture, etc. was not worth moving, and I had a furnished executive flat and a small storage room in California, so we really had very little to move. That was the good thing… The bad thing was that we needed to buy nearly everything. We moved from the Middle East using balikbayan boxes. Advantage: Cheap and customs charges no duty. Disadvantage: It’s bloody slow and you need to plan what you may need before they arrive. Cost of 8 super jumbo balikbayan boxes (Size of a “wardrobe” box): Approx 30,000 pesos. Contents were three boxes with clothing, linens, etc., the rest contained things we bought in Abu Dhabi that are much cheaper there, like pots, small appliances, and electronics. We bought our stove, TV, and washing machine in Abu Dhabi… cost: Approx 60,000 pesos, plus 15,000 pesos freight. (I figure we saved around 30,000 pesos doing it this way).

Cost of two tickets, Etihad Airlines, coach, AUH to MNL: 60,000 pesos.

Now, we had to decide where to move.  We chose a gated community near UP Diliman in Quezon City. Subdivision is around 20 years old. 5 bedrooms (Though 2 are connected in a loft… made those into an office, and one is a small maid’s room under the stairs that we use for storage), 2 full baths. It is a middle-class Filipino community, mostly doctors (four here) or small business owners with families (I am the only “Kano” here, but, on the plus side, one of the “Wowowee” girls lives a few houses down! Just kidding, Rebecca! A most horrible neighbor.  ). Rent, on 120 sq. meters: 18,000 pesos per month, one year lease, with option to buy at the end of year one. Selling price: 3.5 million pesos. Three months security deposit plus first month rent to move in. (72,000 pesos). Association fees of 2,000 pesos per quarter. We chose this location for one reason: Our neigbor and landlady is a very long-term friend of Becky, and she has been very helpful with this move. Becky is not alone and near friends when I travel. They also watch the house for us. I had the option to buy right away, but I will not buy property sight unseen. The house is cement construction (NOT cinder blocks), with sheet metal roof, a very few wooden interior walls, no insulation and plywood ceilings. Filipino style. Pictures are at the end of the post so you can get an idea of what 18,000 a month buys you in Manila.

Utilities were (First month, including deposits):

Electric (3,000 pesos), Water (200 pesos), Cell Phones (2 cards plus 500 pesos load each: 1,200 pesos), Cable TV (2,000 pesos…deposit plus around 800 per month), Internet from Smart (3,000 pesos… Cost of modem, installation, first month use). We originally opted not to take a landline telephone, but we are adding a line for business from PLDT, so add 2,000 pesos… 3 to 4 month wait right now in Manila).

Now, when you rent in the Philippines, any “improvements” are at your expense. Also, unlike rentals or apartments in the States, you usually need to provide your own appliances. Many of these things I have never had to buy before on any flat. We added: a steel security gate (20,000 pesos), changed locks on EACH inside door (3,000 pesos), installed plumbing fixtures (2,000 pesos, including toilet seats that were NOT included in the unit), bought a refrigerator (25,000 pesos), installed a water heater (6,000 pesos… NOT standard in the RP), 4 window aircon units (average 15,000 each… office, sala, each bedroom…60,000 pesos total), fans (For the rooms without AC, 5,000 pesos), drapery material and hardware (15,000 pesos, but Rebecca made them, so no labor cost), 2 LPG tanks (2,000 pesos with regulators), dishes (3,000 pesos with forks, kitchen knives, rice cooker, etc).

Finally, we had no furniture… Had to buy it for all the rooms. Total cost, mid-level quality, mostly Filipino-made:

one queen-sized bed, one sofa, one love seat, one entertainment center (TV), one dining table with chairs(6 ppl), one double futon, two bookcases (office), two office desks, two office chairs, one coffee table, one end table, two bakers racks, one sewing table with chair…. Total cost 375,000 pesos. Add in bed linens and bathroom linens (4,000 pesos).

So, after all is said and done, here’s what it cost us to move to Manila and maintain a “middle class” lifestyle:

Shipment of boxes                                                        30,000

Appliances plus shipping in AUH                                  75,000

Air Tickets                                                                     60,000

Lease Move-in                                                               72,000

Association fees                                                              2,000

Utilities                                                                          11,400

Appliances, fixtures, improvements                            141,000

Furniture and linens                                                     379,000

Grand Total                                                  770,400 Pesos or, US$16,748  

Was it cheaper than the US? I think so for a comparable standard of living. Particularly rent and the cost of furniture (We didn’t buy that particle board stuff… only wood. Not really much more expensive here for good furniture versus junk). Notice that transportation is missing. I have shopped for a car, but am still deciding. Also missing is household help. Rebecca does not want a maid, at this point in time. Figure 5,000 per month minimum for a maid, plus food and for a driver, figure at least 7,000 per month for a full time driver. If you have a Filipino spouse, you may have relatives willing to assume those roles. Currently, our landlady has four maids, and we occasionally use them at a cost of 200 - 300 pesos per day for help with laundry, etc.    

Gone Fishing . . .

Hello Everyone,

I’m currently on vacation in Canada. Normally I’d like to upload a new post for the Small Business File, but the nature of my travels has me in different places and without normal ammenities that help in making a regular e-column come to ‘print’. That’s code for my two year old has greater luggage requirements than me, so I had to leave the laptop at home in favour of a set of toy construction vehicles, a portable DVD player and his favourite story books. There is a silver lining to leaving the laptop at home — it means I have a chance to keep both of my eyes open for great small business opportunities and ideas from Canada that may just work in the Philippines. Thanks for your understanding, and I look forward to uploading a new post in a couple weeks time.

You’re how old?

In my dealings with other expats here in the Philippines, one subject that comes up regularly is that it is hard for us to tell the age of people here in the Philippines.  Some people look much younger than their physical age, while others tend to look older than they really are.  It seems that it is just hard to tell for certain how old a person actually is.

I know one expat who is a single man, and he tells me often that this is a real problem for him.  As a matter of fact, this person has resorted to actually checking the ID of any potential dating partner to verify the age before he actually dates the person!  He does this because he is afraid of actually dating somebody and then later finding out that the person is much younger than he though.  That could turn into a good way to get into some serious trouble, and I don’t blame this fellow for his caution.

Personally, because I am married, I don’t have this same problem, but still, I often have trouble telling ages of people here.  Part of it is because people here are generally smaller than people in the USA where I come from.  So, when you see somebody who is very small, you cannot automatically assume that the person is a child.

Often times, I will meet a Filipino that is young looking, and in the back of my mind I will be trying to judge what their age is.  In my mind, the person looks like they are only 14 to 16 years old, yet in reality I will often find out that they are much older, sometimes as much as 23 to 25 years old!  That is nearly 10 years difference from what I thought they were!  Because of this, you have to be careful saying things that may give away the age that you are estimating they are, otherwise you might say something embarrassing.

Another thing that I find is that sometimes you will meet somebody who is much older than they appear!  This generally happens if the person is quite poor and has lead a tough life.  If the person is 25 to 30 years old, they often may look 40, even older!  I remember one time when I had an employee that I thought was around 50 years old, and it turned out that she ws 28!  Now, that is a major difference.

Now, there is also a flip-side to this.  I often find that many Filipinos are unable to judge the age of foreigners!  I am 46 years old, but people often mis-judge my age.  Almost anytime that I meet new people, they will ask how old I am.  My response is always the same - “How old do you think I am?”  The answer is generally 25 to 28 years old!  Now, I just cannot see how somebody would possibly think that I am 25.  Maybe they are just being kind by saying that, but honestly, I have heard it so many times, I can’t imagine that so many people would give the same answer, and I can only figure that they have as much trouble judging ages as I do with them!

Have you noticed the same that I have?

How about the girl in the photo, can you tell how old she is?

Talking with Inday

Yesterday I was talking to our laundry lady (her name is Inday). She just came back on working with us again. She worked for us before like 2 years ago. The kids really liked her and she liked our kids too especially our youngest one. Before she left 2 years ago, she asked me if she could take off for 2 weeks because her and her hubby will be going to Zamboanga to visit the her husband’s parents. Then the next day she came back to get her paycheck, at that time I was not home but my niece (the one that has baby now) was here at the house. My niece told her that I’m not home but she gave the money for Inday’s pay. Inday stayed for awhile and chatted to some of my workers. She’s kind to 2 of them. After awhile of talking she went downstairs and started talking to my niece. My niece just then told her that if you are waiting for for Aunt Feyma, she won’t be here until later. She’s really busy taking care of a lot of orders. So Inday told my niece its okay I will wait I just wanted to talk to her. Right there and then my niece just told Inday to not worry on coming back because her services on being the laundry lady is already terminated and to not come here and be near here again.

Well, I didn’t know that our laundry lady was being terminated. I’ve been waiting for her to comeback. My niece didn’t tell me anything that she’s firing somebody without my approval. My niece told me a different story that our laundry lady quit working here because she’s tired and she wanted to stay and live for good in Zamboanga. I believed my niece’s story at that time. All along when Inday was gone she’s thinking that I was the one who wanted her terminated. Since then we didn’t see her, but Chris our oldest saw the husband of Inday like last year. They just said hi to each other.

A few days ago one of my nieces saw Inday’s sister at the public market here. My niece (different niece) asked her where’s Inday? The sister told my niece that Inday is in her house , that it was her day off that day. The next day I was so shocked that Inday showed up at our house and came to visit. It was really nice seeing her. The kids were really asking her if she could come back and do laundry here for us again. She told me that really she likes working here because she felt that she was treated really good and the kids are really nice to her. So I told her that if she is available and can do laundry for us that I would be interested for her to work for us again. She told me that “Yes Ate Feyma” I would like to work here again.

So Inday has been here now for almost a week. A few days ago we were just talking about the past and she was asking about some of our employees who were close to her, what are they doing now? She then asked me where’s my niece the one that terminated her 2 years ago. I told her what happened to her. She then said that I am not shocked that she had baby now because she’s been causing lots of trouble with you guys before I left. Inday then told me that there were instances before that my niece would even tell her that she’s (laundry lady) stupid because Inday didn’t prepare her uniform. My niece has lots of bad days before because she’s always called up to see us a lot in our room. We would talk to her for a long time. After talking to us my niece then has a bad attitude and she will take it out on our people. I know she treated our helpers like that before, she’s calling them bad names. It’s so embarrassing because all of them would say we are nice but the niece had bad attitudes. Honestly, even now she had baby she didn’t change. She even called Bob bad names too. Come to think of it Bob was the person supporting her even before she started grade school. Bob was even trying to help her after she had the baby. But she’s lazy and just wants hand outs. Bob and I NEVER RECEIVED ANY THANK YOU from her. None what so ever. But we received bad mouthing from her.

Anyway, I’m glad that Inday believed me when I told her that I didn’t know about her termination until later. And some of my nieces and my workers told her too that I didn’t have any idea of what my niece did to her. I told her from now on to tell me if my nieces or nephews would say something bad to her. She must have like us because she would not come back here to work if she didn’t.

Mabuhay!

Give me Money!!!!!

I love walking around DAVAO and I walk in places where perhaps not many visitors go, and during the day time I have never had any problems at all. In fact I always hear the “HI JOE” and the big smiles and the ladies laughing,not sure why they laugh it must be my hair.

One thing that always surprises me is that no matter what area I am walking around be in a very poor area or a middle class to upper class area I am surrounded by smiling kids who always make themselves known.

However I have noticed despite  if they are dressed in rags or prim school uniforms after a few seconds I hear the “Give me money”, as if its so automatic like its taught in School. The kids never get money but that wont stop them asking me the same question everytime they see me.

Of course I can understand that a white man may be regarded as a walking ATM to some of the poorer people and of course some guys do not have enough to eat for the day. Do not get me wrong I am not annoyed or insulted by them asking , because there by the grace of god, it could be me.

I just cannot fathom why middle class and wealthy families allow their children to do the same, its so unnecessary and it makes the kids look bad too.

Anyone can explain this to me?

Medical debate

Last week, I was watching ANC (the ABS-CBN News Channel) on TV.  The show was “Crossroads” with Tony Velasquez.  Crossroads is a weekly news show that goes in depth and talks to guests about topics in the news.  Something similar to what you might see on Sunday Morning TV in the United States.  Crossroads airs on a weeknight here, though.  It is generally a good show, though, in my opinion.

When I watched the show last week, the subject that was being discussed was whether foreign doctors should be allowed to practice medicine in the Philippines.  I was under the impression that foreign doctors could practice medicine here, as you often see foreign medical groups coming to the Philippines to give charity medical assistance here.  Apparently, though, according to this show, this is not the norm.  Such charitable events are only allowed from time to time with special permission.  An individual doctor from abroad cannot legally practice medicine here.

I must say that this has suprised me, because we are constantly hearing about the shortage of medical experts here in the Philippines.  Not enough Nurses, because they are all going overseas to make bigger money.  Doctors are downgrading their degrees to become nurses so that they can also go abroad.  Perhaps after being a nurse they will be able to become a doctor overseas, but even if they can only remain as nurses, that is a better life for them than being a doctor in the Philippines, or so they say.  So, if the country is having a shortage of doctors, why can’t foreigners practice medicine here if they are so qualified?

As I saw this, I got thinking about the medical situation in the Philippines.  In major cities like Davao, Manila or Cebu, there does not seem to be any shortage of medical professionals.  No matter what the specialty, it seems easy to find a good doctor here.  But, what I hear a lot is that if you go out into more rural areas, doctors have become few and far between.  If this is the case, and there are foreign doctors who want to fill the gap, why not?

Here is another thing that came to mind.  Think about it… who makes the laws in the Philippines?  Of course, the laws are made by the elected representatives in the House of Representatives and the Senate, and they are implemented by the President.  Now, I think we can all agree that these people are generally wealthy.  You don’t get elected to those positions if you have no money.  When wealthy people in the Philippines get sick, in most cases, they go abroad for treatment.  They go to the USA, Hong Kong, Singapore or other places.  Some go to London.  Others go to Germany or somewhere else.  So, in other words, these wealthy people want treatment from foreign doctors, yet these are the same people who say that the poor people who cannot afford to travel should not be allowed access to foreign doctors.  Does that sound fair?

Personally, I believe that excellent medical care is available here in the Philippines.  I have had need for medical services in the time that I’ve lived here, and I’ve never had a complaint about the care I have received, nor the level of expertise of the doctors here.  I just feel that if there is a shortage of doctors, and a deeper shortage is predicted in years to come, why not take advantage of any foreign doctors who care to practice here.

In all honesty, I doubt that the number of foreign doctors who would choose to practice here in the event that they could legally do so would be very high anyway.

photo credit: blueseal