Good Kids
I’m not one who has ever been known to be good with kids… Be great if they were born housebroken, eh? Usually, my encounters with children are with those afflicted with Bratticus Horribilius, or something similar. I think I could make millions if I invented an ointment or something for that disease. So, for me to say what I’m about to say, those who know me must think that I’ve gone absolutely batty: I really like Filipino kids. I must say that I’ve experienced a 180 degree turnaround in my thought process. Since I’ve moved here, I’ve noticed that Filipino kids are some of the nicest, best behaved kids that I’ve ever met. I could speculate as to why, but I would be getting ahead of myself… I really think it has a lot to do with the family structure in the RP. I find “Mano Po” a very civilized custom, and, perhaps, things like that could explain it. A couple of short anecdotes:
Rebecca’s nephew lives with the family up in Abulug. His father is an OFW in the Middle East, and he can be a bit of a handful at times (Everyone gives him a lot of leeway to compensate for his father not being around). Rebecca made a big bowl of popcorn one day (She makes it with coconut oil and margarine… tastes just like at the movies… AWESOME!!), and her nephew was walking around basically leaving a trail. His little cousin, who is around five years old, grabbed a broom, without anyone asking her, and swept up the mess. He later made more mess, and she put both her hands on her hips and said, in Ybanag, something to the effect of “I’m not going to follow you around all day, clean up your mess!”. I told her, “Yeah, boys are really big slobs, huh?!!” She then swept everything up again, on her own. I was impressed… an American child would not even think of cleaning, certainly not without being told to clean. Probably would want to be paid or something… Yet, this little five year old girl…..
Our neighbor’s grandson has latched on to me… Similar situation… Dad is an OFW, and the kid lives in a house full of women, with no men around. He started coming over on the days I am in town working. I let him watch the cable TV in the aircon. Probably the stuff his mother won’t let him watch, like professional wrestling (American culture at its finest!). So, I just kind of let him sit downstairs watching while I am up in my office getting some work done. Once in a while, he’ll come up and say “Kuya John, why are you always up here working?” So, I reach into my wallet and pull out 100 Pesos. “Cedrick, do you know what supply and demand is?” “No, Kuya”. “Well, my supply of Diet Coke and Marlboros is running low, and I need some. How much is your labor worth to run to the sari sari and bring me some of each? Perhaps a Kit Kat?” ” Ok Kuya, I’ll be right back!” After he ate around seven Kit Kats that day, his mama was perplexed as to why he was bouncing around and not eating his supper. Needless to say, her and Rebecca ganged up on me, so I’m limited to giving him one Kit Kat per day (I don’t have kids, so I don’t know… I thought Chocolate was a food group!) I’ve recently been saving coins from my travels and helping him start a coin collection instead…few coins per trip. No negative feedback from that one! Yet….
Final story… I have two nieces in Florida. Now, these are two pretty good kids. They are not spoiled, per se, but I can tell you that at Christmas time, my mother’s house looks like a Toys R Us… I have never seen two kids get so much stuff. They are given every advantage in the world that is possible, and their schedules are kept in INDIVIDUAL DAY PLANNERS! 
What the hell???? That’s right… They each have a Blackberry! Contrast this to the Philippines… Rebecca went out to the ponds to check on the land clearing. She gathered up her nephew and about six other kids, made a picnic lunch (and they fished some prawns from the pond, too), and they went out for the day. She talked to the workmen, everyone ate lunch, and then she, the kids, and the workers, built a raft out of bamboo poles, tied it to a carabao, and went on boat rides all afternoon and had an absolute ball. No batteries, no plastic Chinese toys, no helmets, no safety gear, no nothin’…. Just imagination and having fun. I find it interesting that kids who have literally nothing, or perhaps one small toy, have a childhood of which I am almost envious. Quite frankly, even from poverty, kids are still able to be kids. It is also why I always tell Rebecca that though she didn’t grow up with a lot of money, she grew up with ambition and principles… Two things that money certainly cannot buy.
Hope this is interesting to all of you…
What a great story! Thanks for sharing it.
I totally agree with you. There is just something about American kids vs Filipino kids. When I was in the Philippines I just fell in love with the kids there. I have a baby now born in March, and I really hope she turns out like the many filipino kids I have met. Thanks so much for the story.
Hi John - Great Post! I really enjoyed it a lot! I am a kid lover, and I always have been. You are so right that Filipino kids are much better behaved than US kids. Might be that pro wrestling that is getting the US kids!
Since my return of my last trip to Davao City I have spoken of this same thing many times over. I have been overwhelmed by the kindness and calmness of young children there and have befriended many of them because of this. I now have a 13 year old daughter here in the U.S. that has been given and handed alot and with some unusual factors in life now lives and breaths money, clothes and accessories. Past all the young children there I was also set back by the young people there and how they come about to be so well mannered in many ways that was unexpected to me. Your story is a great post that I can only hope many more American people could and would see here. Many Thanks.
hi john,
I really enjoyed your article, I worked for an american school here for more than a year, the students are mixed of american,british and asian kids (filipino,korean,thais), from my own experience and from what i can see, i can certainly say that there are big difference between the western kids and the asians, don’t get me wrong, the western kids are so open when expressing themselves, i don’t have a problem with that as a matter of fact that is a good thing, however, from what i can see, the western kids are so open that they seem to lose their respect towards the elderly particularly with the teachers, i maybe wrong translating their actions, anyway, the filipinos kids are always tend to be respectful, everytime they see me, they always call me Tito and the use of “mano”, “po” and “opo” even if i am not related to them. when i talked to them they have a very soft voice. with the western kids, they will just call me with my name, i feel that i am just another worker for them, i don’t have problem with it, it’s just that, calling me tito and the use of mano,po and opo makes me feel better and respected. there are very few american kids in that school who addressed me as Sir or Mr.xxx and everytime i hear it from them i can feel their respect towards me.
Excellent PG-rated, “Filipino-interest” story…
You have such a keen observation of Filipino kids. Though there are some counterparts, too, to the US kids, except you mostly find them in the walled enclaves around Manila & suburbs… I know some of them so I know they exist. LOL.
Your story about Rebecca and kids’ adventure on a bamboo raft reminds me of that movie classic “Swiss Family Robinson” — sounds very idyllic.
More power to you and Rebecca and your extended clan.
-a Filipina reader
Miranda… Good luck on the new baby!
Bob… Yeah, the wrestling thing could explain a lot in my case… Wonder what would happen if I break out the 3 Stooges DVDs?
Tim and Dans…. I think you both are right. One thing I noticed in the States is a recent (I think) trend of kids calling their parents by their first names… Sort of makes me cringe when I hear it.
Ecstasy… Sorry about the PG rating… I work around sailors all day and sometimes slip up! You and I were thinking the same on Swiss Family Robinson… I loved the Disney movie when I was a kid!
Hi John,Loved your comparison between east/west kids.I always admire the fact that filipino kids know how to be kids and are mostly well behaved,its so refreshing.Your post made me reflect on my own childhood @ 45yrs ago in the Uk.We had far less than western kids have now,but were far happier.Most of my childhood revolved round being a boy scout,always plenty to do,hiking,camping,canooing with little jobs after school like paper rounds to help pay our way,we were certainly never bored.We in the west seem to have lost the art of simple fun and learning at very little financial cost.It certainly saddens me to see so many undisciplined,unruly kids these days moaning they are bored, with all that they have to day.My Opinion,many years ago when the do gooders of this world stopped discipline in schools my generation knew it was only a matter of time before it came back to bite us.Time was when teachers and police would give us a clip around the ear for wrong doing and on returning home our parents would do the same.Western kids today have an overinflated sense of their own importance and not enough bounderies.They are allowed to grow up far to fast and to much notice is taken of their opinions.We had to be 21 before we were allowed to express a meaningful opinion and nearer 30 before those opinions were taken seriously.Discipline is a necessary fact of life,where would the workplace or military be without it,chaos and anarchy would rule,regards Chas.